Friday, August 18, 2006

Seeking Closure..

Standing Alone is a difficult task. It is a frightening experience which can alter our absolute outlook of life. It is un-relinquishing struggle that consumes our fortitude to succeed. I have stood within the abyss of my soul; Panicking as I face my worst fears, often contemplating measures which would exhibit my inner frailty rather than valor.

Suicide is an act of cowardice. Twice the thought came to my mind. First, when I betrayed a friend of course remorse inevitably followed but the damage was done and a True friend lost. Second, when a friend betrayed me and I eternally lingered for an apology which never came instead I was greeted with additional misery and ridicule of mislaid trust.

How low do we have to sink to realize that no one will assist our emergence?

Who do you turn to when you are disregarded by those you deemed closest?

How do you pacify the turbulence within your essence, a turmoil that has no earthly purpose but is simply an incarnation of your insane thoughts?

My Mantra: Patience, Silence, Tranquility & Contentment.

Patience in escalating commotion breeds a comprehensive state of Silence.
Silence leads to Tranquility.
Tranquility persists to reward True Contentment.

Life is not as complicated as how we perceive it. The trick is to realize this soon.

3 comments:

Sarah said...

sigh... I am all alone here in Indiana! Mum just left this morning to go back to NY. I cried at the airport, on the way home from the airport and then bawled tons here in my apartment. I miss her so much :( Being alone sucks. Not to mention I have no friends here in Indiana and I am horrible at making friends... Too shy to ask people to do stuff like lunch and whatnot.

anyway, I know what I am talking about is different from what you are talking about... sorry for going a bit off topic.

Hard to get closure for things you are talking about I guess... I can relate actually... but I've babbled on enough.

Itsfarsh said...

Sarah, I can relate to your predictment too..

Is it just my understanding or are people who presume to be shy are just being protective. They are scared of being hurt.. i reckon shyness is natural..

As far as making friends go, Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one."

You will be alright :)

Itsfarsh said...

It’s been a hard week. Loads of stuff I like to talk about but I prefer to remain discreet. I just type all my thoughts and sometimes its just plain babbling..