There comes a time when your mom looks at you and gives that look, you instantly know it means trouble. She saunters up to you and the first word that spouts out of her mouth is “Marriage”. You are conscious it’s going to be a lengthy conversation and almost certainly something that you will not appreciate. Don’t get me wrong here; someday I do hope to get married but that day is definitely not in the immediate future.
Some social gatherings you look forward to and others you steer clear of. I am not anti-social but there are some groups that I absolutely hate being a part of. I reckon the MOTHER network works best during social gatherings. Advertising has become an integral part of marriage arrangements. A Typical “Headhunter” can generate a whole list of probable spouses in a flicker. Gatherings are a good opportunity for mothers to update their list and see what’s on display. This unquestionably means that if a mother were searching for someone for her son she would absolutely have to put her son on the pedestal. I like parades they have their charm but I loathe being paraded myself. I abhor being single out in the middle of the room and being pointed out “Look that’s him”. I detest being critique over my form and style.
The scary part is that sometimes mothers use male family members to probe the potential suitor. It’s a worrisome occurrence. As you are seated on the floor amongst other complete strangers you have to maintain your cool & composure. You get startled by the casual greeting and start to think twice when someone introduces himself. Is this going to be an impromptu interview session? I try to keep conversation to a minimal in such gatherings and mostly try to retire with folks I know.
Friend: “Word on the street is that your mom is looking?”
Me: “How do you know”
Friend: “My mom” *smiles* “I think she is pretty serious this time”
Me: “Yeah!! I think my goose is cooked”
Friend: “Man!! You are pathetic, “Marriage-Phobia” that’s what you are suffering from. Don’t you know marriage is bliss” *laughs* "Are you marriage-phobic" *stares at me*
Some social gatherings you look forward to and others you steer clear of. I am not anti-social but there are some groups that I absolutely hate being a part of. I reckon the MOTHER network works best during social gatherings. Advertising has become an integral part of marriage arrangements. A Typical “Headhunter” can generate a whole list of probable spouses in a flicker. Gatherings are a good opportunity for mothers to update their list and see what’s on display. This unquestionably means that if a mother were searching for someone for her son she would absolutely have to put her son on the pedestal. I like parades they have their charm but I loathe being paraded myself. I abhor being single out in the middle of the room and being pointed out “Look that’s him”. I detest being critique over my form and style.
The scary part is that sometimes mothers use male family members to probe the potential suitor. It’s a worrisome occurrence. As you are seated on the floor amongst other complete strangers you have to maintain your cool & composure. You get startled by the casual greeting and start to think twice when someone introduces himself. Is this going to be an impromptu interview session? I try to keep conversation to a minimal in such gatherings and mostly try to retire with folks I know.
Friend: “Word on the street is that your mom is looking?”
Me: “How do you know”
Friend: “My mom” *smiles* “I think she is pretty serious this time”
Me: “Yeah!! I think my goose is cooked”
Friend: “Man!! You are pathetic, “Marriage-Phobia” that’s what you are suffering from. Don’t you know marriage is bliss” *laughs* "Are you marriage-phobic" *stares at me*
Me: "Negative!! Ofcourse not" *looking bewildered*
Friend: "What are you waiting for?"
Me: "Perfect Stranger"
6 comments:
Salaam,
great blog,
I know what you mean, i have a cousin about your age, and he's not married either and gets hell for it Boy am i glad i'm not him,
I guess as they say you just have to grin and bare it (easier said huh?)
btw i'm not for all this pressure to get married, esp form our parents,
i get when you say your not anti-social, its not that you don't like talking or interacting with people its because of the type of conversation your having with them, which doesn't sound anything like a normal convo becuase in the space of the first 30 seconds you get asked how much you get paid and what you do and how many degrees you have and oh no your not a doctor?
sigh, tis life,
anyway sorry for the essay of a comment
ws
It’s the culture we breathe in; community begins to talk if mature children don’t get married promptly. It’s harsher for girls compared to guys. I hate this system and I want to rebel. I will probably end up as an outcast.
I'm a 23 year old female Muslim, not yet married. My parents are unlike most Desi parents, however, because they haven't even begun to look yet! My mother says she will begin to look after another 2 years or so. Education is the most important thing! So unlike those who are being pressured to get married, I'm the opposite, getting worried that my parents are not worried enough about marriage! lol :P InshAllah Mr. Right will come along someday when I least expect it... At least that's what people say. I'm not too sure if I believe that it'll "just happen." We'll see! *sigh*
Good luck to you :D
I'm the opposite, getting worried that my parents are not worried enough about marriage
You got to be kidding me :)
A Few years back when the question first came up i told my mom to give me sometime. The Problem now is that i am still clinging on to that "Sometime".. she is done waiting :)
I think sometimes it's better to take the plunge, jump off the deep side!
Then you can have kids :)
Marriage is easy, it is when you have kids that the work comes.
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