Show me the money!!

I have dim memories of being seven but I do remember my amorous affection for Chocolate. “What an absolutely brilliant Eiddi (small amount of money or gifts elder family members give to children) for my two nieces on Eid!! I bet they would be ecstatic.” I thought to myself. Following is the conversation that ensued after I bestowed their gifts upon them and the rude awakening I was rewarded with.

“What’s this!!” the younger one inquired.

“CHOCOLATE!!” I exclaimed “Don’t you like it?” I added further.

“Yeah we do but where is the Eiddi?” answered the elder one looking dejected.

“This is the Eiddi..” I replied, unable to understand how bemused they appeared when sweet lovable chocolate appeared right before them.

“Are you trying to fool us? Where is the money?” the younger one quipped, “Everyone gave money. We want money!” uttered the elder brazenly as she sprang to aid her sister.

“Money but I got you chocolate, that’s something you love.” I responded.

“Thanks for the chocolate but seriously where is the money? Why are you being such a Cheapo!!” remarked the younger one. “Cheapo!!” A 4 yr old just belittled me. “Where in the world did she pick up that word?” I kept thinking to myself.

Embarrassed I opened my wallet and handed each of them the smallest bank note (5 Dirhams)

“5 Dirhams!! ONLY” the elder shouted, “You are really a cheapo, Batoul Bajji (my sister) gave us 10 Dirhams and she is still studying” “What a cheapo!!” she added.

The word was starting to irritate & infuriate me. To Avoid further persecution I handed each of them 10 Dirhams..

“Wonderful 15 Dirhams!!” moaned the younger one.

My mom overheard the pleasant heart-to-heart and came in. The Elder one turned to her and said, “You sure have a Cheapo son” “Look this is all he gave us for Eiddi” she added as she lifted her hands the thrust the 15 dirhams into my mom’s face.

“How much do you want dear?” my mom amiably inquired.

“100 Dirhams!!” they both shouted in monotone.

“100 Dirhams!!” “That’s extortion, day light robbery, its absurd, completely preposterous & ludicrous” I gasped. Unlike fathers who normally take the vocal route in such situations, mothers have this glance which paints a definitive picture of their mood, it beautifully depicts how annoyed they are and how evidently you are the source of the problem.

Naturally, 100 Dirhams flew out of my wallet and into their awaiting hands. In a flash, they put on their little angel faces and politely said thank you and were ready to gleefully run away.

I wasn’t going to walk out of this empty handed “Hey!! What about my chocolate? Arent you giving that back?” I asked.

“Give Back!! What for?” remarked the younger one.

“Didn’t you say it was Eiddi?” the elder one concluded as they sped off to their next innocent victim.